The Loneliness of the Long Distance "Hunter"

Picture: Loneliness by Maria Cecilia C. Dadalt

“(…) In a single cracking instant we were endowed with a universe that was vast (…), possibly any size up to infinite(…). Bill Bryson on A Short History of Nearly Everything

I have always been drawn to the topic of loneliness. Truth to be told, I have bit of weirdness in me. Not by chance I used to visit cemeteries because loved the peace, quiet, mystery, and… reading epitaphs. Not by chance I grew up on poetry and classics. They are filled with tears and blood shed in the name of love and desperation, and not the least: loneliness.

When I read an article in BBC News (I previously posted it on “Loneliness Could be in Your Genes”) talking about loneliness and its genetic roots, my curiosity was aroused. I cannot say I went much further on the scientific side of the story. Cannot say I went much further on the psychological or sociological sides either. Actually I did not go much further in any direction. But it made me think and made me want to write a bit more about it, nonetheless.

Today, the theme of the night is: LONELINESS! Let’s start this from the beginning. The definition of Loneliness in the dictionary is:
1. The condition of being lonely; solitude; seclusion.
2. The state of being unfrequented by human beings; as, the loneliness of a road.
3. Love of retirement; disposition to solitude.
4. A feeling of depression resulting from being alone.

All of us felt lonely at least once in our lives. The sensations vary, but in general we experience on of the listed:
1. Emptiness or hollowness inside;
2. Feeling of isolation or separation from the world;
3. Vague feeling that something is not right;
4. A very intense deprivation and deep pain;
5. There is no one with whom to share feelings and experiences;
6. Feeling of disconnection and alienation from the surroundings and others;
7. Life seems pointless without people to share it with.
8. Feeling uncomfortable being by yourself and with yourself;
9. Feeling that there is no one in your life who really cares;
10. Being without friends or a companion;
11. Feeling like you don't have anyone who wants to be with you;
12. Feeling abandoned and left out;
13. Being unable to connect with anyone on either a physical or emotional level.

Social causes of loneliness have been broadly studied and discussed. Now scientists are coming with a new insight: loneliness might be in our genes. It can be anthropologically explained although the genetic proof remains to be searched.

“The researchers write that loneliness may have developed early in human evolution as a response by hunter-gathers facing conditions of undernourishment who may have decided not to share their food with their families. By surviving a famine, those early ancestors would be able to propagate during periods of plenty, the researchers theorized. In developing loneliness as an adaptation to survival, these early humans also developed dispositions toward anxiety, hostility, negativity and social avoidance, they said.”

(http://news.softpedia.com/news/Loneliness-Could-Be-Hereditary-
12218.shtml)

So, our hunter antecessors might have guaranteed our existence by excluding themselves from the social context. It is indeed interesting. But let’s not forget that social systems were not created by chance. It was a natural response of humans, and all other living creatures for that matter, to the problem of security hunting. By choosing the path of exclusion, our antecessor might have saved us from the fate of nonexistence, but also might have created a great portion of the social problems we now face.

The idea that our lonely hunter antecessor might have changed the way we behave and interact is supported by Darwinism. Chances are that the hunter, by not sharing his food, would survive and pass on through his offspring the necessary genetic survival kit fully equipped with selfishness and loneliness. Since then we learned that it was necessary to live in groups, but also necessary to be a bit selfish and fend for yourself if we want to survive.

The Loneliness gene also goes quite well with the Alpha Male gene. Main males like to be alone, I mean, with no other male competitors around. I doubt that anyone could disagree with the fact that alpha male behavior (which also applies to females in a slightly different way) is still a human trait. We already have quite an explosive mix without even considering any other human traits. On the other hand, which of our responses to our environment does not become part of our genes? Where does our behavior cross the line and becomes a genetic heritage? I clearly remember having long debates in high school and sociology classes in college dedicated solely to distributing the blame of our acts on either genes or environment.

Having Darwin at my side again, I am confident to say that a lot in our genes came from our antecessors responses to their environment, if not all. The winners survived and passed on their heritage. Our genetic heritage is completely made by slow changes in species behavior and physical characteristics (which can be caused by behavior and can cause behavior). Those changes made us who we are. So, it would be a pretty safe bet to say that our predisposal to be lonely is genetic. Some might be more predisposed than others, the same way some people have darker eyes than others. Hm… Finding the gene might be a tad more difficult than unlearned divagation, I would imagine.

I wonder if we already carry in our genes some piece of information that tells us how to pick up a phone… Up to what point are our genes programmed to instinctively react? In what point of our evolution are we? After how many generations a certain behavior becomes genetic? Ok, this is already too long! We already covered enough ground on genetics and our past. Next step will be talking a bit more about the present… And loneliness. And the same old question: are we all alone in the Universe?

More later...

More links on the Genes x Loneliness:
http://www.webmd.com/content/article/115/111553?src=rss_psychtoday
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4426184.stm
http://news.softpedia.com/news/Loneliness-Could-Be-Hereditary-12218.shtml
http://health.dailynewscentral.com/content/view/0001906/31/
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/11/10/health/webmd/main1036338.shtml
http://www.rxpgnews.com/research/psychiatry/psychology/behaviouralscience/
article_2833.shtml